"I
would not join any club that would have someone like me for a member."
- Groucho Marx
Guidance.
Introductory Lesson F129It is indeed a healthy sign in the development of a young person when they are suddenly to be found in deep solitude, practicing the Forward Defence. It demonstrates they have taken the first step to a life of cleanliness and purity. As these people become older and their pursuit of knowledge of the game and life become more complex, many seek the calm shores of The Queen Street Cricket Club. However, there are members who still require guidance as to The Procedure.
This document sets out in Clear & Simple Terms, everything Current Members need to know before Approaching or Being Approached by Potential Members.
Importance of Membership
A Q.S.C.C. Membership is deemed to be held of the highest esteem and a true reflection of the standing of a man. The Constitution states that, by solemn Oath in Document No: REQ356-932: ''Application for Membership'':
The Solemn Oath:
''Being of sound mind and body, without vice, villainy, nor given to vagrancy, I promise at alI times to uphold the good and virtuous name of the Q.S.C.C. and make prompt payment of all fines and honour and obey all rules and regulations.''The Applicant is thereby committed to the long term goal of providing a permanent and tangible resource for young persons, who might otherwise never had the chance, to learn something of the skills of cricket and of life.
By adding to the pain of failure at the crease by a New Zealand Batsman ''by means of a monetary fine; the Members of Queen Street Cricket Club has raised a large sum of money.
You do not have to be a Scorer to apply the mathematics required to understand the larger the numbers prepared to commit to the Solemn Oath of the Queen Street, the larger the increase of Financial Return.
It is therefore, important for Members to be able to present with confidence 'Procedures for Application'' whenever required.Rule 225:
(Suitability of Applicants)Members need to be aware there are a good number of miscreants in society claiming to be eccentric but are none other than publicity seeking scoundrels and cads.
As an example, there was an infamous American who introduced the game of women's cricket to his country around the turn of the last century.
While he was the self-appointed selector for both teams, he also made some very curious alterations to the Laws of the game.
Players, he insisted, were not to wear the traditional whites. In fact, they were requested not to wear any clothing at all. In addition, they were requested not to play with the traditional leather ball, but a balloon.
Obviously, this is not the type of eccentric we wish to attract.
However, we are sure that be can trust you to use your good judgment when Approaching or On Being Approached.
To have enlisted this club you are, clearly, extremely selective.
Exceptions to Rule 225:
Rule 569:Invitation by Mail, should a Member wish to put forward a prospective Member without their knowledge, a personalised "Letter of lnvitation", is available.
Please send the Prospective Applicants Name and Address to The Chairman who will in due course, dispatch the said letter with Membership Application Form: Document No: REQ356-932: "Application for Membership"Rule 578:
(Storage of Application Forms)By opening the right side of the Official Q.S.C.C. Blazer, the Attired will discover an Application for Membership Holder inserted in the lining at about chest height.
This cleverly designed pocket has been incorporated in said Blazer to habour up to five Document No RE356-932: "Application for Membership" Application Forms. No Member should feel appropriately attired without the for-mentioned forms in place, in the fore-mentioned blazer.
As modern tailoring has developed, it has incorporated the value of said Q.S.C.C. invention and Members can now often find the membership Application Holder incorporated in their General Attire and Formal Dinner Wear. These too, must have the said forms inserted and ready for Approaching or Being Approached as stated under Rule 576; Sec. 682.
Rule 578:
(Extracting Membership Application Forms)With the said Membership Application Form secured in the appropriate location, Members will find, when they are Approaching, or on Being Approached, it becomes a simple and easy action, as they shake hands with the right hand, to place the left hand inside the Blazer and with a flourish present the Potential members with the Application for Memberships Form.
Section DAA358:
Prospective Members Applying for Membership:
Receive this handsome, unframed "Certification of Membership Authentication" to hang proudly on your office or study wall absolutely free!
It will cost you nothing and you will maintain membership for life, so long as you pay your fines ($5.00 per Test Innings Duck, by a New Zealand Test Player.)
To apply, please click on the "Application for Membership Form" to download.
Application to Join the Queen Street Cricket Club needs to be made to:
The Chairman,
Membership Application Selection Committee,
The Queen Street Cricket Club,
P.O. Box 105-890
Auckland
